To whom I once called 'mine'

Memoootttt!

It's been 7 days (or more) since the day you gone away. And today is the day that I know, you gone away, and it's real, and I have to accept it, ready or not. And I know, that's because of my insecurities, my unconfidence, my selfishness, and my stupidity to keep you only for me. *sigh*

You know how I love to re-read our old conversation when I miss you, smiling like an idiot, and missing you much more.

You know how I love seeing our photo, our videocall's screenshoots, how I love seeing your silly face on the screen, how I love listening to your voice, how I love the way you pronouncing my name, the smell on your body, the way you make a joke, and so on, and so on.. Hehe.

...and I miss the moment when your name suddenly came to my phone, asking for videocall or a little chit chat before sleep.

And I'm here, looking at our photo, thinking about our super-short journey. It might be super-short but I already got a looootttt of experiences from you, hey crazy little boy.

...crazy little boy.....but my one and only boy that Im gonna miss him if he gone. Crazy little boy that I want to kill but I know, my life will be lonely without him. Crazy little boy that always makes me insecure for his acts toward something, crazy little boy that makes me mumbling "kamu itu punyaku....gamau tau pokoknya kamu punyaku."

Hehe. Sooooo childish, eh?

I knoooowwww, I know you fed up with me. After all this time, I know that you will be fine, and you will find another girl to replace me. The girl that wont doubt your love, the girl that cute and good enough aaand with the same religion with you so your mom wont doubt about it. Hehe.

Hey, memot. You know, you are not mine anymore, but please remember that I'm all yours. Im still here.

....and you still owe me one jirapah doll.


-gindut-